All the dilemmas, questions and adventures Sam and Nina are having are in line with their Saturn return. A person’s Saturn return is an astrological transit where the planet Saturn returns to exactly the same point where it was in the sky at the time of one’s birth. The first return occurs usually within the 29th and 30th year of an individual’s life, and then repeating in 30-year cycles there after. When Saturn shows up it doesn't make things easy. Saturn commands us to get to work and take stock of how far we have come and where we need to go as we enter maturity.
All this planet talk aside, because lets be real I’m a dating coach not an astrologer, it can also be a powerful time to see major shifts in our relationships. The first return is when astrology says one leaves youth and enters adulthood. This is exactly where Sam and Nina are at in 'Be Here Nowish.' It’s a time of break throughs, break ups, and some necessary breakdowns!
By the time one enters adulthood one is likely have a pretty good handle on what works for you relationally and sexually. Hooking up, loving and leaving ‘em, threesomes, light S & M, erotic colonics and tantric sex. Right? Well if not Saturn to give you a couple lessons regardless of what or who you spent your 20s doing. Saturn leaves you feeling older, wiser and likely with bit more experience under your belt. Here is a list of the ways this planetary shift could change your intimate life, and how to roll into adulthood gracefully. Hold on to your crystals babies…
1. A major break up.
Your 20s are filled with experimentation an exploration. This doesn’t necessarily mean sowing your wild oats like crazy it could also mean an experiment in commitment and monogamy. Saturn return is often characterized as a make-it-or-break it period. If something isn’t working for you in your current commitment you know that you have the planetary support to hit the road.
2. Deepening commitment in an on-going relationship.
This make-it-or-break-it energy could also lead you to taking things to the next step. That might moving in, getting hitched or going on a plant medicine trip that bonds you and your sweetie in a way you never thought possible.
3. You stop doing things that feel wrong.
Have you been faking your way through extravagant role-plays orchestrated by a lover? Have you suffered through pretentious film marathons just to hang with your babe? Maybe you ignored your first instinct is to reject that awkward threesome with your ex and her ex/your current squeeze? These experiences might seem more instructive to you and you will find it easier to stop doing things that are not serving you.
4. A need to be alone.
Maybe you’re like Sam and Nina and it’s the time to be alone to just figure things some things out. There is absolutely nothing wrong with taking some time off from partnerships. A lot of subconscious stuff can come up that you haven’t dealt with. It might be time for some solo adventures or perhaps a trusted friend.
So good luck! It’s an exciting time. Be kind to yourself, others and of course, Be Here Nowish…
A variety of experiences - academic, professional and social - allow Shula Melamed, M.A., M.P.H. to speak aboutself-presentation, relationships, and sexuality with authority.
The views and opinions expressed herein are those of the author's alone and do not necessarily reflect the views of Ora Media, LLC, its affiliates, or its employees.