Happy Birthday, Kim Kardashian! We thought Kim was older but apparently she's only 33. Congrats, Kim.
In Kim's honor, here are 12 Kim Kardashian quotes that will make you go, "Wait...what?"
And let's be clear this isn't JUST an attempt to start a feud with Kanye West (although we're in if he is).
1. About her sister Kourtney's child: Let's just say Mason is the best birth control ever! I'm definitely happy to wait a while.
2. I am Armenian, so of course I am obsessed with laser hair removal!
3. Leggings killed velour sweat suits! I used to only wear them until leggings came along.
4. I hate when women wear the wrong foundation color. It might be the worst thing on the planet when they wear their makeup too light.
5. It doesn't matter if you have a valentine or not -- just love yourself and be your own.
6. About naming her baby something that starts with a K: Our kid, if it’s a K, then they’ll call us the KKK.
7. The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV.
8. I've always been the type to fall in love fast and, with every boyfriend, I plan out my wedding in my head.
9. Botox to me is not surgery.
10. I always put clothes and family photos under the mattress, in case the house burns down.
11. I know some people say it's not the best to work with your family, but I have never understood that because it's always worked so well for me.
12. I am really cautious about what I say and do.
In the past, we've had our fun with Kim Kardashian:
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