If Star Wars Took Place in College...

Or in the South...

Posted by Leah Singerman

Whoever said nerds and sports don't go together was wrong, and Chris Conley is out to prove it. This guy, the University of Georgia's wide receiver, apparently set out last year to put together a huge light saber duel on campus, which is awesome. But his fellow students were super into the project, so he made it into this 26 minute fan film. 

Depending on how you look at it, this film is either fantastically beautiful or fantastically painful. If we're talking about quality, well, you're not going to get much. The actors try, but those Georgian accents just won't quit. And the plot is a little lacking in, well, anything other than light saber duels. But for a fan film made by somebody who's busy being on a college football team and who is just doing this as a tribute to a world he loves, it's great. You've got your hilarious knockoff Star Wars theme, somebody saying "I've got a bad feeling about this," and of course, the classic Star Wars open. 

So check it out: 

We also enjoyed what we're assuming are some (possibly unintentional) references to Harry Potter, Superman, and Thor. Again, a lot of this didn't make sense, but we like the pep talk at the end. Of course you're going to get that from a football player. Now the real question to come out of this is when are we going to get a legit Star Wars sports movie? Cause we could get behind that. 

If you don't have time to watch the film and just want a taste, please enjoy my running comedy (these opinions are only mine, so don't be offended if I hated on it a little hard, cause I might have.)

This is so slow. I'm falling asleep.

WOW, that knockoff Star Wars theme. Hilarious.

Okay, apparently that was a reference to something about Georgia or sports that I didn't get.

Wow, those Southern accents. This is so cute and Georgian. 

We're 20% of the way through the movie and so far I see nothing Star Wars related, other than the opening. 

How did a college football player have the time to get this done?

Look, it's Thor. Wait, no, it's Darth Vader. Wait, no, it's a dementor. No, it has shoes. Is that a bird beak? Ohhhhhh. It's Batman.

Ummm, so, this guy lights up his light saber backwards and then in the next shot he gets it out again. That's a little bit of what I like to call crappy editing. 

This must have been secretly filmed by JJ Abrams. What else would explain all the lens flairs? 

That guy just said "yes sir" to a girl. 

These people just can't keep their accents from breaking through. 

Heeeey, you used the Star Wars quote. Yay!

I hope these people don't actually want to be actors. 

These VFX are really fake. 

So, the guy who can't be killed is... Superman?

This Vader guy sounds like the guy in the Thriller music video. 

I like the guy reading on a bench, not noticing any of it. Is anybody else reminded of that one Stan Lee cameo?

This movie is all fighting and no plot. Actually, though, there's almost no dialog. Is it because the makers agreed with me that you just can't take Star Wars seriously when the characters have southern accents? 

Oh, look. Another light saber fight. Cool spinning jump, that was necessary and effective. 

This is so Harry Potter.

Yeah, you running over to the girl nobody cares about totally saved her. 

That bulldog head looks like a potato. 

Well, the part about football was good. 

So, what did you think of Retribution? Let us know in the comments below or tweet us @Dweebcast

The views and opinions expressed herein are those of the author's alone and do not necessarily reflect the views of Ora Media, LLC, its affiliates, or its employees.

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