Some people say “Don’t mess with Texas.” I say, “Don’t mess with 63-year-old Patty Kearney of Marion, Indiana." Some guy, wearing a Jason hockey mask, broke into her house with duct tape and a wrench, demanding that she and her husband give him their guns. Naturally, they didn’t any. But she DID have a back scratcher. And when she realized HE didn’t have a gun, she beat the hell out of him with it. Until he dropped the wrench. Which, of course, she used to beat the hell out of his head. Again. Patty Kearney- you f*$%ing rule.
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