Smilin’ Joe Won’t Pursue Presidential Nomination in 2016; Already Overcrowded Race Lets Out Sigh of Relief

Despite CNN’s unofficial endorsement of Hillary (although I’d call half a million dollars in donations pretty damn “official”), the scuttlebutt at the recent Democratic Presidential Debate was all about “To Joe or Not to Joe.” CNN even kept an “emergency lectern” at the ready in case the Vice President decided to swing in at the very last moment to take on the Hilldog and try to Extinguish the Bern.

But Joe has finally made his intentions known: he will NOT run for president in 2016. Despite being a member and defender of the two Washington gangs, I’ve always appreciated Biden’s downhome charisma, hilarious verbal gaffes, and the way he dissed and dismissed Paul Ryan throughout the 2012 VP Debate. And c’mon, nobody looks as cool in a pair of aviators.

Visual evidence:
#1. Look at ‘em.
#2. Deal with it.
#3. Shades plus ice cream and cash.

Biden left his possible campaign behind with these inspiring and hopeful words for the future of U.S. politics.

"I believe that we have to end the divisive partisan politics that is ripping this country apart, and I think we can," said Biden, who, though a crafty partisan, often worked across the aisle during nearly four decades in the Senate.

"It's mean spirited, it's petty, and it's gone on for much too long. I don't believe, like some do, that it's naive to talk to Republicans. I don't think we should look at Republicans as our enemies. They are our opposition. They're not our enemies."

He added: "For the sake of the country, we have to work together."

Hillary Clinton needs to take these words to heart and stop touting that Republicans are on her list of enemies. And I’d say Trump should heed his advice as well, but you can’t tell The Donald nothin’.

Adios, Joe. Thanks for not further confusing the American people with another flavor of vanilla.

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